True heavy metal guitar.
I played a gig last night. I almost forgot to take my camera, which would have been a very bad thing, since I hadn’t taken any pictures that day, and the only way to get in my one-pic-a-day was to shoot at the gig before midnight. I don’t know what to think about this picture. I guess I think it’s kind of nice, but if I post it on one of the forums someone will say, “It’s really red,” or something that I’d not realized or was aware of. Anyway, I have to keep at it. At least the subject is fairly interesting. It’s my bandleader’s National Steel guitar, which is one of the coolest-sounding instruments on the face of the earth, lemme tell ya.
In other news, I’ve not been getting much of anything done lately, or so it feels. I read about or see other people accomplishing stuff, and my life seems to be at a standstill. I haven’t completed anything in I don’t know how long. I don’t feel like I’ve overcome any obstacles or learned anything new in months. Stuff that wasn’t complete in December still sits uncompleted. Stuff that I wanted to learn last summer still remains unlearned a year later. I would love to quit my job and go to school full time, take about fifty classes a semester, learn absolutely everything there is to know about everything, that type of thing. I wish I’d realized just how much great stuff there was out there to learn about when I was young and had such freedom to pursue education. It seems I wasted so much time back then.
These days I have to do things like cut the fence row growth down out back, clean the house, figure out the bills, do laundry, go to the day job, get the tires and brakes done on my car, weed the front yard – all this stuff that doesn’t seem to do a thing for my life, but which I can’t ignore lest I want to suffer some unpleasant consequences.
There has to be a better way to do this. There has to be some way I can make this stuff work.
Now wait a minute. You’re going on this long ramble about how you’re not accomplishing anything… in the same blog where you talk about playing a show with your band! (Um hello?) And didn’t you just finish like a whole bunch of really awesome stuff just the other week? And didn’t you just start learning to use new software for your photoprocessing, and aren’t you using it like every day? Strikes me that you’re doing way more than your typical – work/TV/sleep/do it again American.
All that said, man, I totally feel you. I feel the frustration that you’re feeling, like, constantly. I still haven’t gotten to edit the novel I wrote last November! I still haven’t expanded my zine about Katrina (released almost a year ago) into a book like I’ve been planning. Hell, I still haven’t finished moving into my apartment, something I’ve been trying to do since May.
We do what we can when we can. We may or may not have all the time in the world, but all we can do is make what we can with each day, yeah?
This is why I don’t have a television.
Television! How ironic you should bring that up. Tomorrow is trash day. In a fit of…something…frustration, perhaps, I was considering devoting a portion of my evening to disconnecting mine from everything umbilicaled to it and pushing it out onto the sidewalk. (It’s an old console model, so pushing instead of lifting.) Yeah, it’s just not doing me much good.
I guess it seems like what I’m doing (like band stuff) isn’t moving forward, even if there is a creative outlet. It’s a perspective thing, isn’t it? Aren’t you still planning a wedding? That has to take up some time! I still have to do your bee, and it’s stuff like that that’s bugging me.
You’re right about the photo stuff. I am getting something out of it little by little, but that whole patience thing has me over a barrel. I want to learn it all NOW! TODAY!
Tonight I cut down mulberry bushes in the back yard, so, yeah, not all the fulfilling, though I’m sure the neighbors are pleased. (Now I need to figure out what to do with the cuttings. Bah!)